Chronicle Number 33: Epic Year In-Review

A post about my week I could write,

About shopping and baking and talking all night,

But instead from Jordan I have decided to thieve,

An idea for a post that I truly believe

Might not be funny- but I don't really care,

It's my blog! Don't like it? Find other fare.

So here it is, without further ado

Lindsay's Epic Year In-Review.

This year was harsh. Socially it was awesome. Academically it was the worst of my life. I'm not really going to go into that, because if you know then you know, and if you don't then you probably don't need to hear about it. But I have great friends, great family, and a great boyfriend. I know that I depend on you all to get me through, and you've done your job admirably. Sometimes I think that I shouldn't rely so much on you, but I think that we all depend on each other, so maybe it's okay. Anywhoozle, I have to thank everyone for the support.

Music of the Year:

1. The Decemberists continue as my favorite band of all time. I know some people do not appreciate Colin Meloy's genius, *coughAlexcough* but I do.

2. As pretty much everyone else has said, Mumford and Sons has entered my existence and there is no going back.

3. Florence + the Machine- I just wish there was more of her.

4. Lady Gaga. She is controversial and much hated, and let me tell you- I was sort of one of the haters. But I just couldn't resist, and I don't really care who's judging me. *coughMarkcough*

5. This year I've been introduced to a lot of music that is old to the world but new to me. It's been fun to be introduced to bands by Jordan, Susana, and Alex that I'm really enjoying. Among these are the Kaiser Chiefs, Pearl Jam, Five Iron Frenzy, and the Strokes.

Books/Authors of the Year:

I actually haven't read that much this year, which is sad. At least, not a lot of what I've read has stuck out. Here are my top picks:

1. Juliet Marillier, Daughter of the Forest- This book is fantastic. Some of the events might not be palatable for people, especially young ones, but I encourage anyone to give it a chance. It's so good that it's almost bad- I've now read the sequels and am sometimes disappointed, because they just aren't as epic.

2. Sarah Rees Brennan, The Demon's Covenant- Rees Brennan really hit her stride in this book. The first was good, but I don't think it's exactly a book for the masses. This book, the second in a planned trilogy, was funny and tragic all at the same time. I will continue being a fan girl.

3. Scott Westerfeld, Leviathan- This book gets me purely for the world building. It's fantastic. Erin gave me it for Christmas and Nick gave me the sequel. I can't wait to dive in.

4. N.K. Jemisin, The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms- Fantastic. Fan-freaking-tastic. I don't have words for how amazing this book is. Probably my top book of the year.

5. Karen Healey, Guardian of the Dead- I loved the heroine, I loved the world-building, and I loved the mythology. Exactly the right book for me.

Television of the Year:

Well, this isn't even going to be a list. Because while I do watch a bunch of shows (I should probably cut down) there is really only one that I cannot live without. And that is Chuck. Please, please, please, do not get cancelled. I am a super fan, and I love it bunches. Everyone should watch it to make sure my darling show does not go away.

I do admit to an epic love of Merlin on the BBC, however. I do feel bad- I don't wait to watch it in the US, I find it on the internet.

General Events:

1. Italy. I went to Italy. At times I still miss it, and still desperately want to be there.

2. I joined Collegium Musicum, which was nerve-wracking and terrifying, but I'm so glad I did it. I missed singing.

3. I did a bunch of things with my mom! I love my mom, you know. She's so awesome. I should talk to her more, and make lists of things to talk about in this blog that involve her. Wait, she did that for me. :) It was cute. I came downstairs last week and found my list of things to talk about in my blog had a few items added, all ending with "_____ with Mom."

Of course, I can't really cover every important thing that happened to me this year. It would be impossible, and you would get tired of reading.

The last entry this will be

But not, my friends, for eternity!

Only until the year does turn,

Then I'll be back, with words to burn.

Laughter and smiles will surely ensue,

From new experiences I'll relate to you.

I wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year,

Don't fret, for Lindsaytopia soon will be here.

Chronicle Number 32: Maybe More Than Slightly Crazy

Dear Boyfriend,

What does one do when one has nothing to do? In the last week I have watched a ridiculous amount of bad television, done a few useful activities, and read five new books. But I am bored, bored out of my mind (not that it takes much to get out of my mind... the borders are very thin here...) and I can't think of what to do. I'm feeling very lazy from my horrible semester, but being lazy makes me bored. And being bored makes me sad. I am sad, Boyfriend. Fix it.

In this last week without you, what have I done, you ask? Well, I have not been very busy. As I've told you, all I do is read read read no matter what what what, which is considerably less kick@$$ than win win winning no matter what what what.

On Thursday, the intrepid slayer of vile beasties came to visit me. This was pretty anti-climactic. As you well know, I live with Megan. Someone you live with coming to visit you is not actually that exciting. Even though Megan is always exciting! Ahem.

Anywho, that was super fun. We went shopping, meeting Corinners at the mall. Oh! Corinners is no longer the intrepid teenage sidekick. She has been demoted. No, I'm just kidding. She is no longer a teenager. So apparently I have to think of a new name for her. The trials of being an empress, I tell you. They never end.

Back to Megan. I'll tell you all the exciting things we did. We fought a dragon, and saved a damsel, and made friends with the dragon, and found out that the damsel was really annoying so we made a giant taco out of her and fed her to the dragon, and the dragon proclaimed, as all sane people/dragons should, that tacos are the best food in the world.

Okay, that didn't really happen. But we did partake of the best food in the world, and then we curled up under a blanket on the couch and read until the wee hours of the morning. We are party animals, I tell you. Party. Animals.

On Friday we went to the traditional caroling. And you know what I found out, Boyfriend? Everyone wants to talk about you. They want you to visit again.

I find this highly insulting.

I am visiting! Their empress, the most high! They should want to talk to me! But noooo, instead they seek news of Boyfriend!

Okay, I'm not that insulted. I guess you're kind of cool, and I guess that if I like you other people might as well. I'm old news. You're new news.

This pattern continued on Sunday at church. There was also a children's Christmas play, during the service, which was fun. I almost died of the adorableness, but that's a completely different issue.

That night I had my scholarship dinner. I wait on the edge of a knife... Fear curls itself around my toes...

I miss you, Boyfriend, and it annoys me. You should fix that too, while you're fixing me being sad. You should also fix the fact that I seem to be growing steadily more insane, as you can see from this letter blog. Being all alone watching marathons of bad television is bad for me.

Well, I should go. Those books won't read themselves!

Your Maybe-more-than-slightly-crazy-Girlfriend,

Lindsay

PS. Please continue to accept and adore my crazy.

PPS. Lindsaytopia!

Chronicle Number 31: Wise Counselor and Favorite Person of the Empress

My dearest Jordan,

I am writing to you because you are my biggest fan. I know that you are probably mad at me, because I haven't updated in two weeks, but I also know that you understand.

It is probably a horrible thing, but your upsetness gratifies me a bit. Of all the people in my life, I know that you are the one who truly wants to hear the wise words of your divinely ordained ruler. No one but you, sweet Jordan, yelled at me about not blogging. Not Boyfriend, not intrepid teenage sidekick, not the Hispanic goddess, and not the destroyer of vile beasties. No one loves me but you, dearest Jordan. In return, I'm giving you a title. From now on, you are Jordan, Wise Counselor and Favorite Person of the Empress.

The worst part of this is that I haven't seen you for the last two weeks, not really. This was very sad for me.

If it makes you feel better, I really haven't done that much except study. It was extremely boring. Last weekend I spent making my poster for HerbFest, which is what the candy was for. You know that, because I saw you there. What you weren't there for was my crafting of my lovely candy covered poster.

I can't write about this anymore. I'm so bored I might cry, and if I'm that bored it means that you're that bored, and we can't have my favorite person wallowing in boredom. That would be simply uncool.

I have mixed feelings about exams. They are over, so I guess there is nothing else I can do, and I shouldn't worry. That doesn't stop me from it, though.

After exams were over, I cleaned the apartment. That is because I decided that for Boyfriend and my 8 month anniversary, I was going to plan the date.

I am the best date planner ever.

First, I made him dinner. T'was awesome. (Even though I set off the fire alarm. Oops.)

BOYFRIEND: You are the best date planner ever. You light up my life.

Okay, he didn't really say that. But I do light up his life... If only with fire.

I had planned the date perfectly. He had no idea! All of my conversations with him were soooo sneaky.

*Note, this is a real text message exchange. Except for Boyfriend's responses, which got deleted from my phone, and thus are a mixture of memory and pure fabrication*

LINDSAY: Just to let you know, I am planning an awesome date. ;)

BOYFRIEND: Something I can't remember.

LINDSAY: In something completely unrelated, what vegetables do you like?

BOYFRIEND: Really long list. Apparently I love vegetables.

LINDSAY:...which do you like best?

BOYFRIEND: Green beans and broccoli are probably my standbys.

LINDSAY: Any other favorite foods?

BOYFRIEND: Something about Italian. Which is not helpful at all, because Italians have so much freaking food.

LINDSAY: How do you feel about steak? Not that you would get any.

BOYFRIEND: I love steak. Even though I'm not getting any.

LINDSAY: Good. Not for any reason, of course.

BOYFRIEND: Of course not.

LINDSAY: You like steak, I like steak. We're perfect.

I'm seriously like a ninja. Except I know they actually wore dark blue, and I don't think that an entire outfit of navy is fashion forward.

After dinner, we went to the Town and Gown production of The Rocky Horror Show. It was really fun, even though it was crazy raunchy. I have to thank you for that, because you helped me find the event. Without you, I would have been sunk.

The show was wonderful, and then we got to see you at bowling. It was bowling. There really isn't anything to say after that, except that our Lady Gaga interpretive dance should go down in History of Awesome Moments. Maybe we should take our act on the road.

Saturday was spent helping Susie with Demosthenian stuff, watching movies with Boyfriend, and doing normal laundry/packing/getting ready to go things. Saturday night was a Christmas Party, and I'm telling you, Jordan- our new goal in life is to get Susie to play charades with us. I'm telling you, Jordan. We could die happy.

Well, I'm at home now, and Mom is calling me to dinner, so I should wrap this up. I lovales you, Jordan, and I miss you!

Your Empress,

Lindsay

PS. Don't worry! Lindsaytopia is near! It will involve Susana doing charades. Hilarious.

Chronicle Number 30: CSI Lindsaytopia; Evidence of My Crazy

I'm late. I realize this. I almost didn't try and update, but I figured that Jordan might become a tiny tornado of anger if I skipped a whole week again. And if she's a tiny tornado of anger, then things just suck. People being angry makes things difficult for me, and as I really hate difficult things, I try and avoid it.

Besides, you probably didn't want to hear about last week. After the test on Tuesday, I spent oodles of my time writing an essay analyzing death statistics. It was awful, and it took me hours and hours. Thankfully, Boyfriend and I are at the point in our relationship where I am slowly feeling more comfortable breaking the cardinal rule of new relationships, "Never Give Evidence of Your Crazy."

LINDSAY: *calls Boyfriend* You have to come over here.
BOYFRIEND: Why?
LINDSAY: I need you.
BOYFRIEND: Of course I will come, but out of curiosity- why do you need me?
LINDSAY: So many things. But mainly right now to sit on my bed as I shriek and rip at my hair- I mean- work on my essay.

So he came over and sat, it was probably very boring for him. I really did need him! I needed him to sit and make stern faces at me when I attempted to distract him with my newest discovery- VeryMaryKate.com. You may think that I could use many of my friends for this, but the truth is that I am too wily for them. If my girlfriends try to make stern faces at me, I just distract them with gossip about Boyfriend. He is quite the Hot Topic.

I finished my essay, then proceeded to get not enough sleep. Again. Don't deride me, I know. 6 1/2 hours is like a coma to most college students, but not to me. I need my 8 hours, or else I am even more crazy, and I start berating Corinne about dying of malnutrition. Trust me, it is no fun for anyone.

Thursday night, (after turning in the dreaded essay) we went to the midnight premier of Harry Potter. This would have been perfectly fine, except I was already grumpy from lack of sleep, and I made the mistake of telling the professor I'm going to research with that I would meet him at 10 in the morning.

Harry Potter was actually very well done, and I recommend it to anyone who has doubts.

Friday morning I got through the meeting okay. Thankfully, I was actually coherent through the whole thing. My worries were all assuaged. For instance, I was really worried about the summary I have to provide for the biochemistry department.

DR. AWESOME: Do you want me to write a summary of what you're doing and send it to your adviser?

I was also nervous about whether I would be assigned to a project right off the bat.

DR. AWESOME: You won't be assigned a to a project immediately.

And that I would be bad at things.

DR. AWESOME: Everyone's bad at some things. We'll design a project for you based on your strengths.

So I was pretty ecstatic. Then I was pretty exhausted, so I sneaked into Myers and napped on Boyfriend's bed.

I headed back home on Saturday... Not much really went on, except for multiple episodes of candy making, with variable levels of success. I actually thought that was what this whole entry would be about, but I don't think it was that funny if you couldn't see it. Dialogue mostly consisted of

LINDSAY: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

and

QUEEN MOTHER: Is it supposed to do that?

and

LINDSAY: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

You get the point. Children, it is harder than it may seem to make candy.

Now I'm in Atlanta, at Thanksgiving with my dad's family. It's only me, Dad, and my aunt and uncle. It's small, but it's been fun. We all ate a ridiculous amount of Turkey, and my aunt's squash casserole is a gift from God.

I wish you all a happy Turkey Day, and remember to be thankful-

For Lindsaytopia!

Chronicle Number 29: Susana, Hispanic Goddess

Another week has passed by, and I am with you again. I no longer have Collegium, (Sunday was our last concert) so I am brought to you from the comfort of my own apartment common room. We'll see if this is more or less helpful to my creative process.

What is my creative process, you ask?

Well, I pretty much make a list of stuff that happened to me lately, and then I write about it. Sometimes, if it isn't interesting enough, I write scenarios as I wish they had happened. Kind of like this:

How Things Really Went Down:

Ernesto the feral cat walks by my bench.
LINDSAY: *types away in blog*
ERNESTO: *disdainfully ignores Lindsay*

How I Believe In My Heart Things Went Down

Ernesto the feral cat walks by my bench.
LINDSAY: Here, kitty kitty kitty!
ERNESTO: YOWL!
LINDSAY: Ernesto attacked me! He wants my blood! I can see it in his feral kitty face!

Truly, I know not to approach feral cats. They are wild animals, and I know not what they will do.

Why do I keep talking about this? Le sigh.

Last week was pretty low key. After Monday I felt a lot better, but I was still tired all the time, and all I wanted to do was nap and drink sprite. I also did a lot of cross-stitching.

Yes, you read that right. I'm like 80 years old on the inside.

Friday night was especially sad. Boyfriend left on Thursday for a mock trial competition, at which he dominated.

LINDSAY: Boyfriend, Boyfriend! He's our guy! Close that case and make girls cry! Gooooooooo Boyfriend!

He really did make a girl cry once in mock trial. But that was not really his fault.

Anywhoozle, Friday, I was all, "wah wah, Boyfriend is gone." Then-

LINDSAY: Oh no.
SUSANA, HISPANIC GODDESS: What?
LINDSAY: I am one of those girls. I have nothing to do without Boyfriend!

But Susana, Hispanic Goddess, reminded me that it is okay to miss Boyfriend on the weekends, because I don't see him during the week. Also, I am awesome. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

Saturday was pretty crazy. Susana, Hispanic Goddess, invited me to a dinner and show organized by the Hispanic Student Association. It was really amazing. The food was great (I'm going to bother Susie until she makes me some of those patacones) and the acts they got were great. I saw Colombian dance! Also, a mariachi band! I now demand that Boyfriend learn how to play a giant guitar. I'll find a way to make it happen.

BOYFRIEND: Lindsay, where did my guitar disappear to?
LINDSAY: I utterly and completely have no idea! Here, play this giant one while I go look for it!

Afterward, there was an after party at one of the clubs downtown. Susana, Hispanic Goddess, had friends that were going, so we decided to go as well. First we popped by a Demosthenian (Susie's debate society) party. It was good to meet some of the people Susana, Hispanic Goddess, talks about.

So yes, Saturday was my first club experience! Yes, I live in Athens. No, I had never actually been to a club before. I just never found it worth the trouble, and apparently a lot of the good ones you have to be 21 (I think) and I don't have a fake ID. Nor do I desire one.

But this club was fun. Susana, I'm tired of typing this title, tried to teach me to Hispanic dance, which was an epic fail. I don't know why anyone expects that teaching me to dance would not be an epic fail.

For future reference, asking me to: dance, roller skate, ice skate, ski, surf, skateboard, water-ski, bowl, trapeze, walk a tight-rope, do anything requiring me to throw any object, do anything requiring me to kick any object, do anything requiring me to catch any object, bicycle or pretty much anything that requires some semblance of balance or coordination- these are all probably going to be epic fails.

But still, my awesomeness still conquers all. If nothing else, I'm pretty sure that my epic fails will be hilarious. Even if I end up breaking my tailbone.

With that, I leave you-

Waiting for Lindsaytopia

Chronicle Number 28: Oh, Dear Ernesto!

As you well know, I did not update my blog last Tuesday. The world shuddered on its axis for a moment, but then stabilized and moved on. I have been instructed by the Fabulous Fashion Goddess (Jordan) that this one must be awesome. It is a requirement for our continued friendship.

How can I take this pressure? Do you know what this is like? Can you understand?!

No. You can't. Because you don't know what it is like. You can't possibly comprehend the weight of tens of people's adoration. I have so much to prove!

At times, the burden is too much. I just can't take it. I must crawl into a hole behind LeConte and curl up with my dear feral cat friend, who expects nothing and gives me nothing.

LINDSAY: Oh, dear Ernesto! (for this is what I have named Feral Cat)
ERNESTO: Meow. (Translation: I hate you.)
LINDSAY: Only you want nothing from me!
ERNESTO: Meow meow. (Translation: You look like you are going to steal my tuna. Back away slowly.)
LINDSAY: I can tell by your sweet voice that you want me to come closer.
ERNESTO: Rowl! (Translation: I'm going to eat your face!)

Ernesto will come around someday.*

Where shall I start?

Last week and the week before were spent studying like crazy. First for my history test, and then for my genetics test.

Also, interminable time was spend in my biochemistry class. That, my friends, is because of the Lecture That Would Not End.

The Lecture That Would Not End was a terrible thing. I now have the most boring professor in my scholastic history, possibly the scholastic history of the world. Every Tuesday and Thursday, time seems to slow down to a crawl and he talks until I want to die.

On a specific day, he came to the end of one set of slides. We were ahead on the syllabus, and poor pitiful Garrett thought that maybe we would get out early.

Garrett was wrong.

The Professor began a new set of slides! He then proceeded to make simple concepts the most confusing known to man.

He only finished that lecture this morning.

And then... New slides!

I have to stop, because I'm getting bored just thinking about it. This disease of boring is probably catching. I got it from him, and now I'm communicating it across the internet straight into your hearts! THE HORROR.

Thursday night, after the genetics test, Boyfriend took me to an aerial dance show! It was really awesome. It was Date Night for the Foundation Fellows and Ramsey Scholars. Yes, you read that right. Date Night.

Apparently every year, this show lets them come in for the dress rehearsal. They are then encouraged to bring their significant other.

Obviously this is a scheme. They think I don't see through them, but I do. The Honors Program wants the smart people to date so they will be properly socialized, then eventually marry someone, and then have genius babies who are loyal to UGA!

This is an attempt to create a genius army to foil my world takeover. It is as plain as the nose on my face.

I shared my revelation with Boyfriend. He was not as supportive as I would have liked.

LINDSAY: ...Don't you see it?!
BOYFRIEND: You're crazy.
LINDSAY: You wound me.

Speaking of Boyfriend, Saturday his parents came down for the game and we had a tailgate. It was fun. They got to meet our crazy friends, who were all remarkably sane for the occasion.

The game was fine. We won. It was a little bit boring, though. After a certain point, we had our third string in, so the a lot fans were leaving.

After the game we went back and saw Boyfriend's parents some more. His mom gave me a lot of food, which was awesome. She can obviously tell that the way into my heart is through food.

About mid-afternoon, I started to feel a little bit cruddy. At first I thought it was about allergies, because I wasn't around anyone sick.

Saturday night I didn't really sleep. Sunday, Collegium headed to Augusta for our joint-concert with DFA. I really thought about calling Dr. Andaya and telling her I felt awful, but I couldn't.

We got to Augusta and practiced for a long time. My voice was almost completely gone, and I felt like I had a fever. During the actual concert, I felt like I was shaking and freezing, and I couldn't really concentrate.

I got through it, though. Yesterday I stayed home from class and rested, and today I feel much better. This week is pretty light, so I have some time to relax.

And that brings us to today! I'll try to have some crazy times this week to entertain you all. I hope this was epic enough for Fabulous Fashion Goddess. If not, I'm sorry. But remember-

Lindsaytopia is near!**

*None of this actually happened. Except in my heart.

**Disclaimer: This angel cat is not Ernesto The Cat. Ernesto is feral and terrifying, and not to be approached.

Chronicle Number 27: It's Gettin' Hot in Here, So- Oh Jeez I'm Going to Die

It is hot in here. I feel the need to tell you that it is LIKE A SAUNA IN MY APARTMENT.

I might expire.

You might say, "Turn on the air-conditioning, Lindsay!"

To that, I reply "AIR CONDITIONING IS FOR THE WEAK."

Our windows are all open, and it's lovely outside, but for some reason all that lovely air is not entering. However, it is making it very hard to study. Speaking of that, I should probably be doing more of that right now, but I'm hot and tired and I promised myself I would update every Tuesday.

See? I'm being good.

Aigh, my butt keeps sticking to this chair. This is highly uncomfortable.

Gah, Corinne is laughing at me. I'm so tragically misunderstood.

But you lovely 5 people who read this did not come here to read about me whining about the temperature. You came to read me waxing eloquently about various Subjects That Matter, such as World Peace and Harsher Punishments for Parole Violators.

Or maybe you came to read about demon squirrels, whatever.

This weekend Brianna visited me! My dearest bud from faraway journeyed miles to arrive at my door, carrying a blue suitcase and an excellent jacket. She regaled me with tales of a strange kingdom called Japan, and updated me on the status of Baby Bunny Boat, otherwise known as her boyfriend, Scot.

She met Boyfriend, and seems to approve. Boyfriend says he likes her. Of course, Boyfriend knows what and what not to say.

We went to Megan's dance show, which was epic! Megan looked great. Megan performing also means that her mom came down. She brought us food! I have decided that everything she makes tastes of rainbows and happiness.

Fun stuff has happened in the last week, just nothing that is really easily turned into fun stories. I might also just not be feeling creative, seeing as I'm being baked.

I'm sorry, I can't concentrate in this horror. I never said every Tuesday update would be good.

Until next time, remember-

Lindsaytopia is watching you.

Chronicle Number 26: Enter Stage Left, A Vile Beastie

Hello! I'm like a particularly bad case of the flu- contagious and back with a vengeance! I might even make you vomit... With laughter!

I know that you have been waiting with baited breath for my words. You should stop this, because not breathing is bad. It causes problems, and I don't like problems. The only people who shouldn't be breathing are Corinne and Erin, and only on cold dewy mornings when I instruct them to cease respiration, because if they don't I won't be able to see out the windshield and we shall all die. Besides, only the driver needs to be conscious, right? Right.

Last week wasn't so bad. But brace yourself for next Tuesday's blog. This week=HORROR.

That's an important equation. Remember it.

So, after last Tuesday's blog, I spent most of my time until Thursday working on my history presentation. I'm not even going to go into what it was about, because it was super confusing and you probably don't want me to explain it to you. It would take 20 minutes.

Also, last week I was sick . I don't know what it was but the symptoms manifested themselves as a slight cough, throat ache, and MIND-NUMBING EXHAUSTION. I felt sick, but not terribly so, and I thought I should be able to do things. But instead, I wanted to fall over and go to the sweet sweet sugar land of my dreams.

This is not conducive to activity. I BLAME YOU, BOYFRIEND.

LINDSAY: Lalala, I have avoided all of the sickness of my roommates! I have the best immune system ever!
BOYFRIEND: *cough*
LINDSAY: Waaaaiiiiiit... You're ill. Get away from me.
BOYFRIEND: No I'm not. I'm fine, really!
LINDSAY: Okay...
BOYFIEND: No, really, I'm fine. Look at me, I'm so reasonable, blah blah blah. Give me a smooch.
LINDSAY: I believe you, I'm a naturally trusting person. *smooch*

DAYS LATER:

LINDSAY: *cough cough hack hack*

It is all his fault. I demand shiny things to make up for this.

I managed to get my presentation finished, in spite of great adversity all caused by Boyfriend. Then I gave him, Erin and Corinne the presentation for practice and he was mean to me.

Okay, that isn't true, I was just touchy. Sorry, Boyfriend.

The presentation went okay, I guess. I was very worried about it, and I felt gross while giving it.

MY PERCEPTION OF THIS PRESENTATION:

LINDSAY: Marghle barghle confusion confusion *snore*

BUT ACCORDING TO MY TEACHER AND FELLOW STUDENTS, IT WENT MORE LIKE THIS:

LINDSAY: I am extraordinarily eloquent and creative!

Seriously, who knew? ...Don't answer that.

Friday night was Susana's play, and it was awesome! I can't really describe it here, but shout out to her- it was amazing and I loved it and she's the hot theatre goddess of my world. You can quote me on that in your autobiography, Susana.

I went to the football game on Saturday, and we won. I continue never having been to a game we've lost. This obviously means that I am a magical being, probably a gnome or a unicorn. I think "gnome" is more likely.

When I tell you about Sunday, this blog takes a turn from its normal genre. It shall become- a Horror Novel!!!

This Horror Novel!!! consists of a Horror Novel!!! creature.

A... *insert horror music here*

COCKROACH!!!!!!

THERE WAS A COCKROACH ON OUR CEILING.

We couldn't kill it because WE HAVE VAULTED CEILINGS.

Also I AM A WIMP WHO CANNOT APPROACH COCKROACHES. And Boyfriend was far away at a mock trial competition and COULD NOT SLAY THE VILE BEAST FOR ME.

And yes, to answer the question you have- yes. Yes, I would make Boyfriend drive to my apartment from his dorm and kill a roach for me. It is my Sacred Right as a Girl Afraid of Cockroaches.

So Susana, Corinne and I are shrieking, and Megan walks in from outside.

US: MEGAN KILL IT MEGAN FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT.
MEGAN: Um, what?

We explained the problem. (By "explained," I of course mean "went into hysterics and pointed.")

While they devised a plan, I ran around in circles. Literally. We were finally victorious using a broom, a blanket, and several shoes. Don't ask. Henceforth, Megan will be known as "Intrepid Young Adult Slayer of Vile Beasties."

Don't judge me. I'm not proud.

I would talk about boring studying that went on, but I really don't think that anything will top this tale of the Vile Beastie, so I'm going to stop.

Until next time- Lindsaytopia is with you!

Chronicle Number 25: Empress and Poet Laureate? It's All Too Much!

Behind LeConte Hall
Stalked by mangy felines
I update again.

For some reason, I felt it best that it be stated in the form of a haiku. Maybe it will become a theme.

Much has happened in the last week. Actually, it seems that it has been a week of extreme inactivity punctuated with episodes of bustle.

Before Thursday night
Our Hero was studying
Must not fail a test.

Thursday night was my second genetics test, which I felt I did pretty well on. Not great, but okay. Hopefully we'll get the tests back tomorrow.

Boyfriend came and studied with me (well, he was studying law and I was studying genetics) which was interesting... He was consigned to the edge to read while I had all my books spread out in a circle, my preferred method of study. He didn't complain... much. Okay, he didn't complain at all, but he's funny when I accuse him of things he didn't do.

Trapped in a Maize Maze
For two-and-a-half hours
AIGH! I am in hell.

Yes. Friday night, I spent hours trapped in a corn maze. It was super fun... For the first hour. I still spent a fun dinner with the Collegium, and it was a good bonding thing. After all, being trapped in hell with someone, it really brings you closer.

Saturday morning
Munching on cinnamon buns
Dressed in red and black.

As Little and Big would say (AKA Jordan and Boyfriend) "FOOOOOOTBAAAAAALL!"

It was fun! Even though I was hot. And we had to park super far away. We won! Every game I've gone to, we've won. Obviously I am magical. And I got a lemon icy thing. Balance is restored.

Dressed up, yet again
Six-month anniversary
I guess I like him.

Yes, yes. It was Boyfriend and my six-months. It doesn't seem that long! But I think I will keep him around.

Sunday with Merlin
Monday in class and with books
Hurray! T'was my week.

Must go, the feline is back.

Chronicle Number 24: Mutant Killer Attack Squirrels

Here I am, sitting here, on a bench outside of LeConte Hall. I'm hanging out, waiting for Collegium to start, and I have run out of things to do on the internet.

Yes. You read that right. I have run out of things to do on the internet. I used to think that was impossible, but as I sat here and gradually rummaged though all the sites I ever go to, and they became more and more, well, embarrassing, I realized there was one thing I haven't done in a long, long time. Write a blog.

I've been avoiding it. There comes a critical point at which it's a bit strange to pick something up after you have left it so long. Also, there is the little voice inside me, who is quite loudly insisting that I am a bad, bad person for not writing for so long.

I try to ignore this little voice. You see, you listen to the little voice (which disney tells you is what is truly in your heart), about blogs and everyone says it's okay, but that one time you listen to it about drawing mutant killer attack squirrels all over your roommates genetics homework, well then everyone is just looking at you like you're crazy.

Ahem. Right.

So much has happened in the past months, that it seems almost pointless to get it all down. I really only have about five more minutes to kill, so I'll be quick.

Went to Italy. AWESOME.

Worked a lot. NOT SO AWESOME.

Am back at school. A MIX OF AWESOME AND SUCK.

Classes seem to be going alright. I joined Collegium Musicum, a choir focusing on early work. I am alternatively terrified and elated.

There is a boyfriend. All of you should have already known that. Though I am no longer the intrepid teenage hero, because I am not a teen, I wonder- is he the intrepid teenage boyfriend? I am not a teen, but he is... In other news, I'm a puma.

I should head to East Campus, but I'll be back.

If I'm not, you know who to blame. (Mutant Killer Attack Squirrels!)

Chronicle Number 23: None of That "Logic" or "Rationality" Here, Please

Dear friends, I am back. Please insert a rambling apology for never writing here: _______.

Okay, done? Well, I guess I'll just dive right in, then.

I'm going to Italy! I'm sure that most of you had heard of this, but I figured I should just inform you again. I'll be setting off on May 8th. My program ends on the 2nd of June, but my intrepid mother will be flying over for two weeks to tour after it finishes. I'm so excited, and it doesn't even seem real. I've been yammering at Corinne to teach me some Italian, but she has been singularly uncooperative. Of course, this probably has more to do with me than with her.

LINDSAY: Cooooriiiiiinne....
CORINNE: (sensing doom) ...Yes?
LINDSAY: Teach me Italian!
CORINNE: Okay, what do you want to know?
LINDSAY: How do you say, "Where's the party"?!
CORINNE: ...No.
LINDSAY: What about, "Dance with me, you fool!"
CORINNE: You fill me with despair.
LINDSAY: Fine. *sigh* How do I find the airport?

She's taught me how ask where the airport is about five times, and I still can't remember.

The last couple months have been completely insane, I tell you. I think I really just forgot this blog even existed. I had a test (or two) every week for five weeks, then spring break, then an organic chemistry test. That adds to me running about like a crazy person trying to get my Italy stuff in, and well... You know what happens. Everything has been a whirlwind.

Things have been going pretty well, with the exception of Microbiology (grrr) and this last O-chem test, but more on that later.

It's been finalized, I'll be living in an apartment next year. I've already signed a lease, and will be living with Susanna, Megan, and Corinne in Lakeside Apartments here in Athens. It's a year-long lease, so I'll probably stay for the summer and take classes. It'll give me some time to fit in fun classes I don't have time for, (like psychology) and maybe retake O-chem 2211 for a better grade.

I'm looking forward to living in an apartment. A lot of people don't really understand why I want to live out of the dorms, and I totally get their perspective. However, Kristina is an RA next year, so she wouldn't be living with us, and I really want to give some other girls the opportunity to live in the suite as well. I've had a great year here, and I want other people to get that experience. Also, it will save me some money to live in an apartment and be off the meal-plan.

As you know, spring break was a couple weeks ago. That was a lot of fun, even if it did kind of knock me out of my test-taking rhythm. We did not get to go to Harry Potter World, because it doesn't open until June 18th. I find it very misleading that they said it would open in the spring. Obviously, I was on spring break, and therefore it was spring, and the park should be open. And June is not, by my estimation, the "spring." June is summer.

And don't give me that hooey about the "calendar" and "solstices" and "the turning of the earth." (Mark, I'm looking at you.) June is the summer and you know what I say to anyone who says differently? PBBBBBBT!

On a more serious note, things have taken a nosedive in my organic chem class. I did so well on the first test (way above the average) and then just bombed the second test. I wouldn't really be sharing this (I don't want to worry anyone) but it really has helped me come to a realization.

This isn't me. I think the reason I did so poorly is that I gave up. I fell back into last semester's pattern of seeing something that was really hard, thinking that I would fail at it, and believing that. I get the impression that a lot of the chemistry professors just don't think that any of us can do this, and they make it very clear that they are expecting a lot of us to fail.

I'm in no way saying that this is all of them. I've had teachers like Dr. Kutal (spring 2009) and Dr. Locklin (now), who genuinely care about us and want us to do well.

But this isn't about them. I've had bad teachers before, and what was my response? "I'll show them." Not "Woe is me, they're right, I'll never succeed," depression, but more of a righteous anger that they underestimated me.

Anywho, I slipped back into giving up, but I'm not going to do that again. Why? Because giving up is easy. Giving up is a cop out. And I don't cop out.

So the experience has been kind of disheartening, but I can come out of this stronger than I was before. Okay, serious speech over.

I miss everybody at home a lot, but I have an optimistic view for the future. I'll be home for Easter!

Remember people, though I may disappear into the mists of the internet for months at a time- Lindsaytopia lives on in the hearts of all.

Chronicle Number 22: Diary of a White Woman with Deeply Rooted Confidence Issues

So. This blog really hasn't existed in the last year. Admittedly, that is completely my fault. Every time I sit down to start writing, it just seems there is nothing to say. This is ridiculous, because my life has been so busy lately that it would be impossible to have nothing to talk about.

Today is January 30th, and while I can't promise to be better (it might be a lie) I can promise to try.

What is going on in the life of Lindsay? I know you are all wondering! Well, I'm now in my second semester of sophomore year here at UGA. Things, while not going completely swimmingly, have been reasonably okay. Of course, by "reasonably okay" I generally mean that I haven't started running around in circles shrieking yet, but don't count that out.

I'm taking four science classes. I vacillate between horror and thinking that it really isn't that bad. After all, at least they aren't all upper level courses... and I don't have four labs... I can do it! Heh....

On the positive side, my Organic Chemistry teacher seems pretty awesome. He is really good at explaining complicated things and relating them to the real world. It does result in some pretty interesting times while studying, though.

LINDSAY: Corinne! It's beautiful! This all makes sense, finally!
CORINNE: That's great!
LINDSAY: ...But what if it doesn't make sense? What if I'm crazy and I just think it makes sense but I'm wrong?
CORINNE: I make it a point not to talk to you when you get this way. I will now proceed to give you a pointed "My roommate has deeply rooted confidence issues" look.
LINDSAY: I see that pointed look. I know it means that I'm terrible at Organic Chemistry. Why? WHY?!
CORINNE: If you stop whining I'll give you a Cheerwine.
LINDSAY: ...Okay.

This really happens! Well, it is always possible that I am making it all up. But it's always true in my heart!

Physics and microbiology are utterly uninteresting. This is sad, but I'm dealing with it. I'm hoping micro will get more fun when we get into the actual organisms instead of talking about the cell wall and peptidoglycan. And when our professor realizes that yes, we are all sophomores and juniors in college, and yes, we should all know the meaning of words like "inert."

Biochemistry, however, now that's a hoot. And by "hoot" of course I mean "perhaps this class has been sent to finish off what was left of my soul."

It actually isn't the class itself... How to explain? The information is complicated, and there's a lot of it, but there isn't anything I can't handle (so far). The teacher actually seems like a really nice guy and very passionate about his part of the class. However, it is the fact that there are rants every Tuesday and Thursday (you could set your clock by them) which always go something like this:

PROFESSOR: Look at these quiz averages! Half the class didn't do well.
LINDSAY: Ah, yes. I didn't get to study for this one, I had my first lab... I'm really sorry, I'll do better next time.
PROFESSOR: This means that half the class is going FAIL HORRIBLY. You CANNOT CATCH UP.
LINDSAY: ...Wha-
PROFESSOR: This is FAST-PACED. You WILL NEVER LEARN IT.
LINDSAY: But-
PROFESSOR: You will NEVER get into ANY medical school or graduate school.
LINDSAY: I-
PROFESSOR: If you FAILED this you will FAIL the TEST and then FAIL the COURSE and THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO.
LINDSAY: Instead of learning today, I think I shall be paralyzed by fear. It will be a party.

In all seriousness, it almost seems as if he has just written half of us off. And if we mess up once, we're just goners. I don't respond well to this "method" of "teaching." As stated above, I slowly become paralyzed with terror and then am of no use at all.

Not quite there yet, though. Really, for the amount of stuff I'm doing I think I'm okay.

Well, there is the rundown! Hopefully it will sustain you for a little while, as you wait for the return of my glorious presence.

Just remember, no matter where I am- Lindsaytopia is always with you!