Chronicle Number 12: Incommunicado

Yes, yes, I realize. I disappeared off the face of the earth for a while. I mean, I was home for a week, so really you got an update of me in person, and who could want anything more?

Finals are starting soon, and that means I really will disappear, this time into books. So... What has happened to me in the past week?

Well, upon arriving back at school, getting through my hordes of fans and the paparazzi, I realized that I had a formal lab report (which I referred to as the LAB OF EVIL), questions for the quiz bowl tournament to write, and an essay due, as well as my lab final on Wednesday. I immediately dove into a book and went into the many hysterical stages of work grief.

Anyway, everything got done, even though there were a couple really wishy washy times when I nearly burst into hysterical tears. Now, tears ruin your great leader's beauty, so we just couldn't be having with that. But your heroine got it together and on Thursday night was watching the Boondock Saints in celebration.

Friday was spent helping write questions for the tournament, and going to Megan's concert, which was super fantabulous except for the sopranos, but it's really hard for a soprano to win me over anyway.

We then watched Moulin Rouge, and I went to bed, thinking everything was peachy.

As per usual, I was mistaken. (I am never wrong, but I am often mistaken.)

After about 6 and 1/2 hours of sleep, I walked into room 513 of journalism at 8:00 and was greeted by Tim's crazy eyes.

TIM: We are so screwed. We have nothing done. Well, to be precise, we're missing 4 rounds of literature questions.
LINDSAY: Aw, nuts.
TIM: Okon is furiously writing at his house and sending them to me. I'm getting the first packet together, and by the way, I've slept 8 hours in 6 DAYS.
LINDSAY: I'm not going to lie, I'm a little bit afraid of you right now. And for you right now.

We proceed to write questions as the tournament progressed. This mainly meant that while others were reading questions and doing stats, and all that jazz, Jordan and I were sitting in our own little bubble writing on anything Okon needed. This birthed episodes like:

LINDSAY AND JORDAN: *write write write write*
MUNEEB: *wanders in* Hey guys.
LINDSAY (to Jordan): You write on Pearl S. Buck, I'll write on Anaya.
JORDAN (to Lindsay): Okay, got it.
MUNEEB: Hey, whatcha doing?
OKON: LEAVE THEM ALONE.
MUNEEB: What- wait, I-
OKON: They are working JUST DON'T TALK TO THEM.

And:

TJ and OTHERS: *wander in*
LINDSAY AND JORDAN: *write write write write*
OTHERS: YAK YAK YAK!
TIM: Y'all, shut up!
LINDSAY AND JORDAN: *write write write write*
OTHERS: WE SHALL NOW TALK VERY LOUDLY.
TIM: JUST GET OUT. They're working, GET OUT!!!!

I really think that the most comical thing about this is that through both of these lovely situations, I had no idea what was going on. I did not hear any of this, I was too concentrated, someone had to tell me it happened.

Later that night, Corinne and I went to the quiz bowl party. Our first college party, we're so cool. It mainly consisted of the Game of Life and Rock Band.

Hearing Chiego, Tim, Paul, and Cullen sing made it all worth it. I nearly cried a couple times, I was laughing so hard.

Yesterday was mainly me being carried away by a deluge of work, and now I am here with you.

And now I'm leaving on my raft in the river of work again!

Chronicle Number Eleven: Is That Your Sneaky Run?

This chronicle is named "Is That Your Sneaky Run?" because that is the precise question that Corinne asked not five minutes ago. It went something like this:

CORINNE: Is that your sneaky run?
LINDSAY: Why yes, why yes it is.
CORINNE: It's very good. I nearly couldn't see you.

The reasons we were sneakily running need not be made known to the general public. Just rest safely in the knowledge that it was in the interests of your intrepid teenage hero, and thus, in your own interests.

So, that thing called school. It is going quite well, actually, I think. The last two weeks (pretty much since you heard from me last), have consisted generally of Study!Lindsay and Insane!Lindsay switching off. Last weekend I went to Florida with the Quizbowl, which was super fun/AIGH GET ME OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW. The AGMOoHRN time was mainly when I was in the car, and when my dear teammates were seemingly attempting to kill each other.

Well, something that redeemed the weekend, and something that I have found to be extraordinarily amusing- Drunk people!

A couple of the guys (over 21, y'all) apparently have a tradition of getting super drunk the night before quizbowl. (Neither of them driving, y'all) For the sake of privacy, let's call them Bert and Ernie. The night for Bert and Ernie consisted of 1) singing in polish, 2) singing in russian 3) fighting about which was better, Poland or Germany.

Hilarity ensued, especially when Bert would tap Ernie lightly on the shoulders, and Ernie would fall over. Or when Ernie would try to walk over to Bert, and then fall over. Or when Ernie would try and convince me that he wasn't drunk- and then fall over.

So that was special. I've decided that while I still shall not get drunk, watching other people do it is okay.

The rest of quizbowl was good. I rode back in the car with Okon, Christine, and Steven, which ensured hilarity.

After that, the week erupted into madness, as it seems my life is wont to do. Had a calculus test on Tuesday (went okay, not sure how I feel about it, but I'm not crying into a bowl of oatmeal, am I?) had lab on Wednesday, and a chem test on Thursday, on which I got a 93! W00t.

I'm leaving now, to attempt to catch up in history, which I had woefully abandoned in an attempt to learn everything else. Much love, everyone, and don't worry-

We will attain Lindsaytopia!

Chronicle Number Ten: I Desire a Mushroom Farm

When I am empress, I have decided to also be a mushroom farmer. Apparently, these actually exist. I am filled with joy at the prospect.

You see, in the book I have for my freshman seminar, it has a line that states "the ants carry the leaves to fungi, which they farm like we farm mushrooms." My first response?

LINDSAY: It shall be MINE!

So this is my new goal in life. Perhaps it will last a day or two.

The friends visited from Atlanta, which was a prospect that filled me with joy and horror. Joy, because I love my friends and miss them, and horror, because I wanted them to like UGA, so I wanted to think of cool things to entertain them with...

All which consisted of horrible failure after horrible failure.

FAILED ATTEMPT NUMBER ONE

MEGAN: Let us tralala to the corn maze!
LINDSAY: Corn maze? That sounds like a cool and entertaining thing.
MEGAN: We shall set out at 6:30!

6:30

MEGAN: Um. Well. Some people are not ready.
LINDSAY: I guess we can wait.

7:00

BRIANNA: .... Are they ready yet?
MEGAN: ...No.

7:30

MADDIE: Are they ready yet?
LINDSAY: ...No.

8:00

MADDIE: Are UGA people always this late?
LINDSAY: No! No! I pride myself on my punctuality!
BRIANNA: ...Fo' serious?
LINDSAY: Actually, no. That was a lie.

8:30

MEGAN: They're ready!
LINDSAY: Yes! Let the night of entertainment begin! We shall grab our coats and go.

8:35 IN THE LOBBY

LINDSAY: Um... Corinne? Where is everyone?
CORINNE: They left.
LINDSAY: !!!
CORINNE: They didn't want to wait.
LINDSAY: !!! !!! !!!
MADDIE: ...Epic fail

...Yes, the caravan we had been promised had left. We had been given directions, but when we followed them, they did not lead us to the corn maze. All lies, lies and slander.

FAILED ATTEMPT NUMBER TWO

LINDSAY: We're going to the Rocky Horror Picture show! It should be super fun.
BRIANNA: YAY! XD The evening is not a failure yet!

CINEMA: I am closed.
CORINNE: All lies, lies and slander.
LINDSAY:...Epic fail.

Failed attempt number three consisted of us trying to get stirfry, and the people completely messing it up. It filled me with sadness.

But after the three failed attempts, we pretty much just hung out in the room and talked/did homework/played scrabble. I should of remembered, this is what my friends and I do.

So the weekend turned out to not be such an epic fail. I'm in a bit of a tizzy, because last night Megan scared me half to death.

MEGAN, LOOKING AT CHEMISTRY SYLLABUS: Oh.
LINDSAY: What?
MEGAN: Lab proposal 15 is due this week.
LINDSAY: !!!
MEGAN: Oh. Well, lab is on friday, I'll be fine.
LINDSAY: !!! Don't lie to me, woman!
MEGAN: No, seriously, look. It's right here.
LINDSAY: !!!

So I'm off to write that. Oodles and oodles of fun.

Chronicle Number Nine: Am Getting Really Tired of Writing "Chronicle Number ___"

But I shall continue, dear subjects of Lindsaytopia, for you.

Feeling a bit strange, seeing as there is nothing really for me to write about. I mean, I'm in one of the lulls from horror and pain, and horror and pain are always the best subjects to write about.

I do have slight signs of horror to come, as the calculus test is in two weeks.

LINDSAY: Calculus test? What calculus test? Tests are a fallacy.
CORINNE: No, actually they really do-
LINDSAY: Shhhhhh! *glares* If we don't think about it, it doesn't exist!

Just kidding, Mom! Heh heh heh.... *shifty eyes*

I have decided to go to the quiz bowl tournament in Florida. Therefore, Corinne and Erin are attempting to teach me how sane people act.

LINDSAY: The last cookie?! MWAHAHAHAHA!
CORINNE: Lindsay? Laughing maniacally is not something sane people do.
LINDSAY: Dually noted. I shall fool them, fool them all! BWHAHAHAHA!
CORINNE: ...no.

STANDING IN THE STIRFRY LINE:
LINDSAY: Where in the world is Willis?
CORINNE: There is no one to give us extra steak. Sadness.
LINDSAY: Mother... I'm hungry. And my nose is froze.
CORINNE: And my ears is froze.
LINDSAY: *as Corinne is distracted, attacks*
CORINNE: Lindsay, sane people do not attempt to eat other people.
LINDSAY, MOUTH FULL OF SLEEVE: ...no?

Megan has been notoriously absent from my life, seeing as she had a huge test this morning, millions of extra curriculars, and of course... Graham.

But that's okay, she always comes back.

When she was here last night, she was studying for her huge animal science test with a friend.

This leads to episodes like this: (I couldn't make this up.)

MEGAN: Why must you be careful with a gerbil's tail?
LINDSAY: I think I could have gone my whole life without hearing that question.
FRIEND: Because it might fall off!
LINDSAY: ...

And this:

MEGAN: What is another name for a fizzy mouse?
LINDSAY: ...Carbonated rodent?

I haven't seen her since she left this morning, so I don't know how she did, but it's Megan. I'm sure she aced it.

There it is, a small bit of Lindsay insanity for you! And don't worry, we will still attain Lindsaytopia!

And gosh, Bri Bri, of course you can have a country. What do you take me for?

Chronicle Number Eight: I Plan to Live in Sunny California with Dancing Boys

When I conquer the world, I shall live in sunny California with Corinne and our dancing boys. I will be a fair and just ruler, no need to fear. There will be no time for pesky wars, because time will be dedicated to desserts, some smatterings of work, and paying attention to Me.

Of course, no desserts for the dancing boys, sorry, you must remain fit.

We will be benevolent, bestowing our riches on those who need it and those who please us. Willis and Coffee Lady will get a large chunk. Willis makes us our stirfry and remembers our names, and Coffee Lady remembers our names and makes us coffee! She also gives us extra whipped cream. For this, they will each get one million dollars!

Those that displease us? Well, to Greenland with ye! You may have the snow and ice.

I think I shall make my mother ruler of Florida. Mary Evelyn can have a country/state as well.

It will be a Lindsaytopia.

But that is in the far future. Like, a whole three and a half years. (I think I should conquer the world after college). But what is going on now?

I regret to inform you, your fearless leader was driven slightly insane with work. There was a history midterm, a lab proposal due, and a chemistry test, all in the same week! Sometimes I wonder if teachers get together in secret teacher meetings and plan when the deluge of work will come.

SECRET TEACHER MEETING:

DR. ATWOOD: How about the 6th through the 10th? That seems good for me.
DR. CARTER: Hmmm... No can do, it's my wife's birthday. I need to be totally focused, in case I forget.
DR. STANTON: How 'bout the next week? That way everyone else will have done their midterms and they'll be feeling secure. We'll get 'em when they least expect it!
DR. ATWOOD: Bwhahaha!

So while your intrepid teenage hero was living under a pile of textbooks and paper, she went a bit bonkers, as is her wont when the going gets tough.

Things happened like this:

LINDSAY: What is this thing you call food? I don't seem to remember having any...
CORINNE: Human beings require it- you put it in your mouth, chew, swallow- any of this ringing any bells in there?
LINDAY: Oh... Is that what that persistent ringing in my head is?
CORINNE: ...No.

And:

LINDSAY: AIGH! *headdesk* WHY?
ERIN: What now, Lindsay? *Says "Lindsay" as most would say "insane babbling personage"*
LINDSAY: I know what you think of me! I can hear your pernicious thoughts!
ERIN: ...No.

And:

LINDSAY: If I could only-
CORINNE: No.
LINDSAY: But it would make everything so much-
ERIN: NO.
LINDSAY: Just a few-
CORINNE AND ERIN: Ritual suicide by paper cut is not an option.

But the week was soon over, I feel pretty good about everything, and made a 96.67 on the chem test!

The weekend was spent doing absolutely nothing of any value. I promise to come back sooner! We will attain Lindsaytopia!

Chronicle Number Seven: If Only My Life Was a Musical

If only my life was a musical. Things would be better, then.

I am thinking of this (though truly I've thought this since I knew what a musical was) because I watched Rent on Saturday night. While UGA was being firmly beaten into a crying pulp, I was singing happy songs.

I don't know if everyone has seen Rent, but oh well. You are just going to have to bear with me.

Rent is an awesome movie. Probably one of my favorites, but the end is... Face it, incredibly cheesy.

MIMI, EXPIRING OF AIDS: *Cough* I die!
ROGER, EXPIRING OF AIDS: *sings* Your eyes are pretty. I love you.
MIMI, IN MIRACULOUS RECOVERY: *cough* Gee willikers, I feel better.

Now, as I grow up, I've decided this: Pathetically cheesy is okay! If my life were a musical, everything would be pathetically, cheesily perfect.

As in the calculus test.

REAL LIFE:

LINDSAY: This test... It makes the AP Calculus test look like a meadow. Full of pretty flowers. Where I'm dancing. With Patrick Demsey.
DR. GRAHAM'S CHAIR: Squeeeaaaak!
LINDSAY: *Pounds head against desk* I HATE LIFE.
DR. GRAHAM'S CHAIR: Squeeeeaaaak! Squeeaaak squeeeaaak squeeeeeaaaaaaaaak!
LINDSAY: *cries* WHY?!?? *poundpoundpound*
DR. GRAHAM'S CHAIR/EVIL INCARNATE: SQUEEAAAAK!
LINDSAY: Your DEATH is IMMINENT.
DR. GRAHAM'S CHAIR: Squeak?

LIFE IN A MUSICAL:

LINDSAY: My dear Dr. Graham,
There's something wrong with my test!
In my AP Calculus class,
I always was the best!
I don't know what to do.
I fear that I may die.
DR. GRAHAM: Do not worry, I will curve it,
There is no need to criiiiie!
Here, the Calc class all promptly stand up and begin dancing in unison.
Dr. GRAHAM: For I am Mathematics Man
And I will do all that I can!
To fight the good fight,
With integral power!
To do all that I might
To make their scores tower!
There will be a low grade ban,
'Cause I am MATHEMATICS MAN!

Sometimes my brain scares me...

Maybe my life would not be a particularly well written musical... But it would still be wonderful! And full of singing! (Granted, some people I know would just have to be dancers. You know who you are.)

But seriously, ppl... (that ppl thing is a joke. I don't actually do that. Although now that I've pointed it out it's not funny.) Anywho, what do you want to hear about?! I'm begging, here. I'm running out of material here. (Um, Exhibit A: Mathematics Man.)

And now, in parting, a line from another musical!

Adieu, Adieu, to you and you and you!

Chronicle Number Six: Back by Popular Demand, AKA Mark

*is sheepish*

I know, I know. I haven't been here in awhile.

In my defense, I have a sort of excuse... I don't think it's a good one, but when has that ever stopped me before?

If I were to actually write a blog before last thursday, it would not have been a blog at all. It would have consisted of:

"AIGH!!!*headdesk*"

I didn't think that would satisfy your rabid interest in my life.

But all the same, what can you do without me? I'll tell you what you do. You wither. You wither into mere husks of yourselves. And what am I to do with friend-husks? Shall I make friend-husk dolls? I think I would have to combine you, and that would be no fun. Mark, I saw you this weekend, and I could just see you wasting away.

So, what is going on in my life, you ask? What has been occupying my hallowed brain?

Weeeeell, the reason I was insane for about a week was...

Chemistry.

Now, chemistry is actually very easy. For now, its all review, and that is pretty easy. However, my teacher likes putting the fear of Atwood in his poor defenseless students.

LINDSAY: Hmm. This problem is pretty easy. I like it.
ATWOOD: The problems on the test are nothing like this. They are TEN times harder. No, A THOUSAND times harder. No, a MILLIEON* TIMES HARDER!!! BWHAHAHAHA!
LINDSAY: *cries*

*To be read in funny evil sorcerer voice

This was a dark time in my life. It was full of me systematically beating my head into a wall. Mother, please understand that I am being metaphorical here. Did you see any bruises?

But I took my test, and made good grades, and had a good french class (I know, I know, GASP!SHOCK!AW!) So things have been better.

I also got to go to six flags! That was equal parts WHEE! and AIGH!

But I'm sleepy.

So I'm going to bed. (I don't think this was actually very funny. But I'm tired. So Pbbbt.)

Chronicle Number Five: Tailgating, Football, Headaches, O My!

Carlye (My RA), Megan (My intrepid teenage roommate) and Me! Tailgating!

Greetings from far Athens! I have come to spread the sweet rain of my presence onto your drought-ridden minds!

How has it been without me? Sad, yes? I really pity you. I get to be with me all the time.

The week has been pretty good! I feel like I'm really getting used to this college thing. Plus, it helped have gone home last weekend. Saw the friends, saw the family, was pounced upon by the church. Ooh, church pouncing. So painful. All that brick and mortar.

Anywho, the week was fun. It was short, 'cause of labor day. Therefore, Lindsay has decided to make a decree. From now on, no school on Mondays. No work either! Every Monday shall be a labor Monday!

LINDSAY: This is a good idea. All should obey me.
THE GOVERNMENT: Um. No.
LINDSAY: Pbbbt.

So maybe it won't actually happen. But it should.

What interesting things happened to me this week? (I know, I know, "Lindsay, everything that happens to you is interesting!" I keep telling you, I can't tell you everything! This blog would be too long.)

Class has been okay. Kind of boring, but oh well. French remains slightly terrifying.

FRENCH PROFESSOR: Ah ahm old. Ahnd kind av creepeh.

But I guess the most exciting thing (to you, maybe) is I went to the football game!

LINDSAY: W00t! *waves pom pom*

Actually, I did not have a pom pom, although I wanted one. Woe is me. No pom poms for Lindsay. No one loves her enough to get her one. (coughMegancough)

MEGAN: How was I supposed to get you a pom pom?
LINDSAY: I don't know. Be creative.

Well, the game was sort of fun. When they were actually doing stuff. And when I could understand the stuff that they were doing. And when I wasn't dying of heat exposure... There was a lot of

EVERYONE AROUND LINDSAY: W00T! OMG! YAAAAY!
LINDSAY: Yay! YAY! Wait... what happened?
MEGAN: We moved the ball 20 yards.
LINDSAY: YAY!
EVERYONE: ... We have already stopped cheering.

And some of

EVERYONE BUT LINDSAY: Aww.
LINDSAY: ???
MEGAN: (who is an expert by now, all hail Megan) We thought we made touch down, but it touched the ground at the one yard line.
LINDSAY: Awww.
EVERYONE BUT LINDSAY: We have stopped. Does she have some type of disease?

And more of

LINDSAY: Megan! Maddie said they had fireworks at her school! Every time they made a touchdown. Where are the fireworks???!
MEGAN: There are no fireworks.
LINDSAY: No fireworks? That is heinous.

We left at half-time, after the pretty band did pretty things. Megan had a dancing thing and I had a headache. So after we had dinner I went and lay down in my room... An end to the fun.

But I am going to take away the positives of this experience! YAY to watching guys jump on each other! YAY to watching a guy leap nimbly around another player like a bouncing gazelle! YAY.

And plus, any anger I had against UGA for the fireworks debacle was soothed today by the chocolate fountain. After all, what great wound cannot be cured by chocolate?

Chronicle Number Four: Remember the Steak Day

Hello from University of Georgia! Have you missed me? It's been nearly a week since you heard from me last. I honestly don't know how you do it. If it makes you feel better, I don't know what I would do without you, my ravening horde of fans. (If "ravening horde" is defined as approximately 10 people, tops.)

Well, here I am, and I think I'm starting to get into the rhythm of things. I've found friends that will deal with my mood swings (Although I miss my at home friends terribly) so that's good. I like the people on my hall. Myers is pretty awesome, and there is no partying here that I know of (YAY!) so no random annoying drunk people! I know, I know, they are a part of college life, and I haven't been here on a game weekend, but still.

By the way, game day is Saturday! We're playing Georgia Southern.

LINDSAY: Go. Fight. Win. W00t.

Okay, so I'm not that excited. Oh well. I do have tickets, though. I got a split season, so I think I'll go to at least one game, and then sell the other tickets for mucho deneros!!!

SLYTHERIN!LINDSAY: MWAHAHA! I take bribes. Food or money is acceptable.

OMG YOUS GUYS. So, get this. Before game day, they have a food festival!!! Okay, maybe not a festival, per say, but there's steak! And asparagus! And cake! And boiled peanuts!!!

I'm going to be so fat. I'm lucky this only happens before games. (I think.)

Speaking of food... A horrible thing happened today. Your queen was beset with a flipping tray.

And showered with coca cola.

AND ALL HER BEAUTIFUL FOOD WAS ON THE FLOOOOOOOR.

*sob*

It was a horrible tragedy! I call for a memorial day on which we remember and mourn for this sad event!

Thankfully, the intrepid teenage sidekick Megan stepped in and stopped your intrepid teenage hero from fainting from the horror. So I got to go get more food. The crisis was averted. (But it was still a tragedy! Perfectly wonderful steak! On the carpet! A travesty, a travesty, I tell you.)

Ahem. Perhaps I should stop talking about food. Classes are pretty snazzy, a different crisis was averted when I finally got to order my french book. I'm keeping up with my reading... There was a horrible calculus quiz.

DR. GRAHAM CALC TEACHER EXTRAORDINAIRE: Do this. By the way, it's sort of like your homework , but completely different!
LINDSAY: Gaak!
REST OF CLASS: Gaak!
LINDSAY: *makes something up.*

Oh well. It's a tiny droplet in the lake that is our grade, and I'm pretty sure no one else had any idea either, so I'm not going to worry about it.

Oh, yes. I also nearly died. Please don't freak out. I know it's hard, thinking of loosing your fearless leader, but I was nearly mowed down by a mo-ped. It would have been a horrible undignified death. Thankfully, my wonderful friend Corinne reached out and snatched my back from the jaws of death.

LINDSAY: I saw my life FLASH BEFORE MY EYES.
CORINNE: Hee.
LINDSAY: And it was TOO SHORT.
CORINNE: You're okay now.

I promptly asked Corinne to move to California and marry me. :D Because that is so obviously the best reaction to a near death experience. So she will now be referred to as "my intrepid teenage fiancee."

But this was probably a good thing. Honestly. (Seeing the silver lining here.) I am now being EXTREMELY careful.

Nothing else of note has really been going on. (I know, I know, my every breath is of note, but that would make a very long blog entry.) I gave blood yesterday! Do you think my blood can convey awesomeness upon another? I think so. Lucky person.

Anyway, too de loo! Comment comment comment!!!

Chronicle Number Three: The Rumbly Rumbly Rain

Or non-rain.

For three days now, there have been great huge threatening thunder clouds hovering over the entire UGA campus. Every time I leave my dorm, I expect the heavens to dump a deluge of water upon me. Does it? No.

You might say, "Lindsay, this is a good thing." But you see, it hasn't been raining At All. This is extremely annoying.

CLOUDS: *hover ominously*
THUNDER: *rumble rumble*
RAIN: Um, no. I don't think I'll fall here. So plebeian.

The rain in my brain is quite arrogant.

I guess I should give some details about what's going on with me. The rain is not actually the most important event in my life right now. I've been at college a week now! Actually, a week and two days! "How has it been so far?" You ask. I know that you are all simply desperate for details of my life.

Classes have been alright so far. I finished my chemistry homework this morning, which had me feeling very accomplished. True, I mostly did it because Megan was doing her's and I felt like I should be a good student as well.

I'm feeling a bit scattered. Not saying that I'm ever really put together. I'm usually wandering around picking up pieces of me. I haven't really gotten a rhythm to this college song yet.

Today I had my lifeguarding skills test. It was a bit disconcerting, seeing that the guy who was testing me didn't seem to have any kind of idea what he was doing... And he was a manager.

MANAGER: Um, so now we're going to test this. Do it like this.
LINDSAY: Actually, I learned that we should do it this way.
MANAGER: Um. Okay.

My logic was, if he was really confident in what he was doing, he wouldn't be listening to me. (But that would be ill-advised. Not listening to me, that is. *angelic smile*)

Oh, and what was also kind of awful is that I knew I had missed the bus I needed to take, so I power walked down to Ramsey. Which, if you didn't know is A VERY LONG WAY. It was pretty much 20 minutes of

LINDSAY: Come on, Lindsay, you can do it! (Insert number here) more minutes! Go go go!
CONSTRUCTION WORKER: Lay low, the insane girl will pass soon.

I hope that this doesn't continue forever. GAAK! moments should definitely cease. Somehow, knowing myself, I don't think they will.

I think this was enough to supplement you for awhile, (I know my absence is terrible) so I think I'll go now.

Hey- I will warn you now that entries might sharply decrease if I feel I have nothing to say. (Oh, ha ha Mark, I hear that retort. "Aren't you saying absolutely nothing right now?" You know what my answer is? Pbbbbt!) So, if you do want me around ("I don't" is also not an acceptable answer) ask me something! Tell me what you want to hear about. Give me a topic.

I love you all! (Comments make me happy!)

Chronicle Number 2: Do Not Expect This Much Lindsay All the Time.

No, I am not going to update this everyday. The way I see it, that would be almost as annoying to you as it would be to me. However, this is the second day of classes, and I haven't been here that long, so a lot is happening.

As a college freshman, I am using many new words! No, those of you out there with bad, bad minds, these are not curse words. (Although I have decided to use "Shish-kabob" as a pseudo curse word. Its fun to say. Go on, "Oh, shish-kabob") Sadly, the main new word I've been using is "Gaak!" Yes, the exclamation point is a must. Such as getting on the bus yesterday and passing my turn. GAAK!

Such as taking a wrong turn walking to calculus and ending up behind Sanford Stadium. Now, I do hold that it would have been a short-cut. Except for the small obstacle of the GIANT BUILDING IN THE WAY. You guessed it. GAAK!

Such as my history telling me that the books were relatively cheap, and me going to the bookstore and seeing the actual amount. GAAK!

But despite the presence of frequent "GAAK!"s, most of my classes were okay... if slightly mind-numbing. I'm sure this will not be the case when we really get into new stuff, instead of "hey, let's say our names and talk about the syllabus again."

French was interesting, if at times heart stoppingly terrifying. I got to class just a little late, but didn't walk in alone, which was good. Of course, once we actually started talking, things got double plus ungood.

PROFESSOR DU FRANCAIS: I will start each lesson with a question. *speaking really fast* Que est-ce que tu a fais au weekend? (What did you do this weekend?) *stares straight at our heroine*
HEROINE: GAAK! J'ai joue au "frisbee" avec mes copains... (I played frisbee with my friends)
FRENCH DUDE: Tout le weekend? (All weekend?)
HEROINE: GAAK! Non? ...
FRENCH DUDE: *stare stare stare*

Finally, he stare stare stared at someone else. Which was actually quite funny. I will now begin writing french in italics.

FRENCH DUDE: *staring at other guy* What did you do this weekend?
OTHER GUY: I moved in.
FRENCH DUDE: Did you come by car?
OTHER GUY: Chicago.

Yes, he did actually say "Chicago." Obviously, he had thought the teacher asked him where he was from. Anywho, this launched said teacher off into a loooong story about how anticipating questions was bad, and how he had an aunt who was deaf- well now he was sort of deaf too so students would have to speak up- but she had anticipated questions and she would have a completely different answer than the question called for and by the way some people are selectively deaf, like his grandfather who heard his uncle ask if he was a fool and slapped him upside his head which really hurt the uncle but serves him right for calling his father a fool.

Aren't summaries fun?

After that class, the "turning the wrong way and saying "GAAK!"" episode happened. Calculus was just calculus, I had it yesterday, so I don't think I need to elaborate. Though I think it might be bad that I think my teacher is adorable, in a funny, geeky way. He was telling us about his 5 year old daughter, and how he wished she would stop playing with dolls and start playing with numbers. (He was kidding.) But he paces a lot and writes down whatever comes into his head on the board.

The I ate lunch, then laid about, then went to history, which I will love. I've pretty much decided I'm changing to double major in Microbiology/History.

Then I bought books, (GAAK!) and ate again (a lot of eating at college) then went to a pj party in the Myers lobby. Fun.

So, there is an absurdly detailed summary of my day. Please don't be too annoyed, I promise that this will not happen all the time.

BTW, Snelling Dining Hall chocolate mousse- made of awesomeness.

Starting this, Or Confusing Chronicle Number One

I am here! Athens, that is. Actually, I've been roosting here since last Thursday... I know that day lives in your memory, and will forevermore. It was the day that your wonderful Lindsay left you, all alone in the plains of the desolate Augusta. Desolated without Lindsay's face- her beautiful smile, her clear, bell-like voice.

I know it's awful, but you'll get through it. I believe in you.

So, anywho, the point is that I got here last Thursday. The drive was oh so many tons of fun. I was definitely feeling very lonesome, even in the drive here. Sorrowful Lindsay kept fighting with Practical Lindsay.

SORROWFUL LINDSAY: Oh, poor house! How I will miss thee! I shall see you years hence.
PRACTICAL LINDSAY: Dude, you are so coming back labor day weekend.
SORROWFUL LINDSAY: O! Kemp Drive! How I love thee! Let me count the ways! I live on you!
PL: Labor day. You are coming back two weeks from now.
SL: Sadness!
PL: Two weeks!

Practical Lindsay eventually won out. When we got here, we did some shopping. What must every college student have? The answer is simple. A Wal-mart. We spent about 30 minutes getting almost everything on our list and then an HOUR looking for a LIGHTBULB. Oodles of fun.

Then the parental units left, and I did some meeting people, who totally shot down my brownies. You would think that brownies would pack some serious friend-punch (though perhaps that is a poor choice of words) but no, they were shot down, time and time again.

LINDSAY: Want a brownie? And a new best friend?
SORORITY GIRL: Um, like, no. *queer "are you trying to make me fatter than you" look*

LINDSAY: Brownie? Anybody want a delicious homemade brownie?
RANDOM MALE VERTEBRATE: No. Though I think it's nice that you're in love with me.
LINDSAY: ...what?

Finally I went to game night and put the brownies on the table. Where people ate them who did not know that they were from me. Ultimate failure. And no, for those who haven't lived inside my head, some of the above did not actually happen. It was mostly what I was imagining these people thinking.

Most of the next few days was made up of making new friends (which actually worked out pretty well) hanging out with them, and eating.

A lot.

Because without the class, I've found that there is really nothing to do during the day at college accept go to a dining hall and drink smoothies. But as classes are starting, I think that there will actually be no time to hang around and drink smoothies, no matter how fabulous said smoothies are.

So. Classes. Pretty important, right? They started today. For me, at 8 AM! Yay! Contrary to unpopular belief, 8AM classes are so not fun. I got totally lost looking for class #1, attempting to find a room that didn't exist, and thus walked into my first class 10 min. late. But they understood. I am, after all, an ickle freshie.

I also went to Integral Calculus and Chemistry today, nearly lost my wallet, took at 30 min hike, bought my books and nearly cried (OMG BOOKS COST A LOT), and went to a choir thing that I'm not sure I'll do. Oh, and got on the right bus but missed my stop and rode around campus. Around and around and around.

There you are, your healthy dose of Lindsay! Hopefully it will tide you over until you can bask in the warm glow of my presence again.

BTW, my roomie is super cool. She is very much like me...

Toodeloo!