How can I take this pressure? Do you know what this is like? Can you understand?!
No. You can't. Because you don't know what it is like. You can't possibly comprehend the weight of tens of people's adoration. I have so much to prove!
At times, the burden is too much. I just can't take it. I must crawl into a hole behind LeConte and curl up with my dear feral cat friend, who expects nothing and gives me nothing.
LINDSAY: Oh, dear Ernesto! (for this is what I have named Feral Cat)
ERNESTO: Meow. (Translation: I hate you.)
LINDSAY: Only you want nothing from me!
ERNESTO: Meow meow. (Translation: You look like you are going to steal my tuna. Back away slowly.)
LINDSAY: I can tell by your sweet voice that you want me to come closer.
ERNESTO: Rowl! (Translation: I'm going to eat your face!)
Ernesto will come around someday.*
Where shall I start?
Last week and the week before were spent studying like crazy. First for my history test, and then for my genetics test.
Also, interminable time was spend in my biochemistry class. That, my friends, is because of the Lecture That Would Not End.
The Lecture That Would Not End was a terrible thing. I now have the most boring professor in my scholastic history, possibly the scholastic history of the world. Every Tuesday and Thursday, time seems to slow down to a crawl and he talks until I want to die.
On a specific day, he came to the end of one set of slides. We were ahead on the syllabus, and poor pitiful Garrett thought that maybe we would get out early.
Garrett was wrong.
The Professor began a new set of slides! He then proceeded to make simple concepts the most confusing known to man.
He only finished that lecture this morning.
And then... New slides!
I have to stop, because I'm getting bored just thinking about it. This disease of boring is probably catching. I got it from him, and now I'm communicating it across the internet straight into your hearts! THE HORROR.
Thursday night, after the genetics test, Boyfriend took me to an aerial dance show! It was really awesome. It was Date Night for the Foundation Fellows and Ramsey Scholars. Yes, you read that right. Date Night.
Apparently every year, this show lets them come in for the dress rehearsal. They are then encouraged to bring their significant other.
Obviously this is a scheme. They think I don't see through them, but I do. The Honors Program wants the smart people to date so they will be properly socialized, then eventually marry someone, and then have genius babies who are loyal to UGA!
This is an attempt to create a genius army to foil my world takeover. It is as plain as the nose on my face.
I shared my revelation with Boyfriend. He was not as supportive as I would have liked.
LINDSAY: ...Don't you see it?!
BOYFRIEND: You're crazy.
LINDSAY: You wound me.
Speaking of Boyfriend, Saturday his parents came down for the game and we had a tailgate. It was fun. They got to meet our crazy friends, who were all remarkably sane for the occasion.
The game was fine. We won. It was a little bit boring, though. After a certain point, we had our third string in, so the a lot fans were leaving.
After the game we went back and saw Boyfriend's parents some more. His mom gave me a lot of food, which was awesome. She can obviously tell that the way into my heart is through food.
About mid-afternoon, I started to feel a little bit cruddy. At first I thought it was about allergies, because I wasn't around anyone sick.
Saturday night I didn't really sleep. Sunday, Collegium headed to Augusta for our joint-concert with DFA. I really thought about calling Dr. Andaya and telling her I felt awful, but I couldn't.
We got to Augusta and practiced for a long time. My voice was almost completely gone, and I felt like I had a fever. During the actual concert, I felt like I was shaking and freezing, and I couldn't really concentrate.
I got through it, though. Yesterday I stayed home from class and rested, and today I feel much better. This week is pretty light, so I have some time to relax.
And that brings us to today! I'll try to have some crazy times this week to entertain you all. I hope this was epic enough for Fabulous Fashion Goddess. If not, I'm sorry. But remember-
Lindsaytopia is near!***None of this actually happened. Except in my heart.
**Disclaimer: This angel cat is not Ernesto The Cat. Ernesto is feral and terrifying, and not to be approached.
2 comments:
I am glad you have become wise to the Honors program's evil scheme to encourage the production of genius babies. But I have news for you, it is so that they will be loyal to UGA and give lots of MONEY! However, I have news for them, UD tried that and sent your father and I many opportunities to contribute as "Double Dels" but alas, although we had genius babies, (you and Nick) we didn't send them money nor are you loyal to UD. So don't worry. It won't work.
Is Ernesto a black cat? Because if so, I have totally met him. I think I remember chilling out with him for like... ten or twenty minutes one weekend in an attempt to get him to come close enough to pet. What I mostly achieved was a cat glaring at me, but it was worth a shot.
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